I'm getting so, so sick of exercising :/ And I feel so self conscious going to the gym 2, sometimes 3 times a day and seeing the same person on. I usually get those "Back again?" comments. It's embarrassing because I go so much but I'm still fat. Grr. Diet needs to change.
Tomorrow is graduation for my college. I'm going in to help set up and stuff. I'm sure there'll be lots of food there. Sigh.
Intake: Wine (200) Rice with dal palak (700) Cheese cake (700) Rice with eggs (500) Funions (200)
Yeah fuck today. I skipped out on the gym :/ I didn't go play with my friends because I felt weird about these two guys being there who I don't really know.. I'm normally open to meeting new people but my social meter is too full right now so making new friends just seems tiring to me.
I overate :/ Gah. I feel so helpless sometimes. I have to keep going though. I can't keep allowing myself to fall and making excuses and shit.
I'm okay with a break from the gym though; I've gone to the gym every single day for at least a month now, even during finals. I think I deserve one day of rest.
Man! This sucks. I really meant to net at ZERO today and yet I ended at 1,200 :/ Exercise wasn't good at all. Went out to eat with my friends again. I keep track of intake totals but I'm not good at remembering the specifics of what I'd eaten because I usually have a little of everything.
I've decided that if I want to be successful, I have to be antisocial again. Cut my friends off for a little while. Last summer, I spent all my time at the gym and at home reading books. I was super lonely, but I lost so much weight. I want that again.
Tomorrow I'm hanging out with a different group of friends, but I know we'll end up going out to eat too >.< Why is eating so important for social interaction?? Ugh.
Whatever.. I think I'll have lost a pound this week by the time Sunday rolls around. From there, I'd like to isolate myself from everyone and focus on losing weight before moving onto campus in June.
I also want to do Whole30 again. I felt amazing during it, and it was mentally rewarding. Just for two weeks. I can do that.
Bad! :( I might try to go to the gym tonight and burn off 300-400 calories.. but I'm not sure if I'll actually do it ^_^;
My friends suck ._. We ended up spending the entire day eating and drinking.. and there was some walking and football throwing, but that's about it. It was an amazing time nonetheless. Lots of shopping and banter and stuff.
Tomorrow I'm gonna go to the park with one of my friends and play frisbee. That, and the usual gym, will be the extent of my exercise. I'm glad I'm taking advantage of my semi-unemployment. At least I'm going out and not being a bum..
I'll update later if I do end up going to the gym..
Edit: Okay. 30 minutes was all I can do because it was getting really late. I exercised as vigorously as I could. 1,200 isn't too bad I guess :/ I hope to net 0 or below tomorrow.
Fuck!!! So instead of spending the day being active, my friends and I decided to go out to eat and then get high, subsequently followed by copious amounts of alcohol. That kind of resorted in lots of calories consumed and not enough burned. Ugh.
We're going out again tomorrow, but hopefully we'll be doing some actual outdoors sports and walking. At the very least, I'd like to not exceed 200 calories consumption.
The days after, I have more sports sessions planned with some of my guy friends. Thankfully, they won't be too lazy to play with me. I better burn some friggen calories.